Work In Progress

Taylor's feet were dragging by the time she kicked off her shoes and found her way to the kitchen. She went straight to the fridge, and leaned against the door while she perused the inside.

"Ohhhhhhhh..." She found a container of pre-cooked sweet potato. She immediately grabbed it, and then paused. She wanted to cheat a little bit, but she didn't want to feel gross or anything. But sweet potato was just a normal thing, not a cheat thing. She felt obligated to eat something less healthy, but... she loved sweet potatoes. And she was too tired to think too hard about it.

She stuck the container in the microwave and leaned her head against the cabinets while she waited, still oblivious to Alaina's presence. Her eyes stayed closed until the timer went off, and she grabbed the container, sprinkled a little cinnamon over the top, and got a spoon before going to sit.

"Oh," she said, finally noticing her dojo-mate. "Hey, Alaina."

She sat down in her chair. There were four at the table, one for each of them, and when Cassie or Akashi or Nikolette joined them in the kitchen they had extra folding chairs waiting in the gym. She began mashing up her potato with the back of her spoon, and was momentarily incapacitated by a big, overwhelming yawn.

"Wow," she blinked, and shook her head. "Pretty tired."

Alaina gave a wave to Taylor as she entered, but saw that Taylor appeared to be even more on autopilot than Alaina was! "Heya Taylor!" Alaina said when Taylor finally ended up noticing her.

There was tired, and then there was tired. Alaina looked at Taylor and saw all of the latter. "You look exhausted, moreso than usual. I know its a dumb question given whats happened but are you all right?" Alaina asked. Taylor wasn't one to beat around the bush, so Alaina figured that being straight to the point would get the most honest, open answer from Taylor.

Losses bugged Alaina, but she couldn't imagine what losing a title could possibly feel like. Because of the hectic training schedule Alaina barely saw anyone she didn't train with regularly. She wasn't at Taylor's level yet, so it didn't make sense for them to train together unless it was Taylor directing things.

Taylor was the first wrestler Alaina met from Friction. Instead of telling a new nobody off, Taylor helped her out. Alaina always felt like she owed Taylor. Maybe this was her chance to repay that debt?

Taylor issued a single chuckle under her breath. "Oh, umm..."

She had no idea what the answer was. What could she say?

"I had kind of a rough night, I guess..." She said, and fiddled with her now mashed-up orange glob with her spoon. "Did they tell you?" She asked, and looked at Alaina while trying to mask her concern.

Alaina looked partially worried and partially curious. "No, no one has told me anything yet. I was out, came back in for bed then oddly enough had to run back out last night for a friend..." Alaina said before tilting her head a bit.

"What did happen?" Alaina asked. That look Taylor had wasn't a very common one for her. Neither was playing with her food. "Don't be nervous, just tell me whats up." Alaina said as she moved, pulling up a chair next to Taylor and sitting down, leaning onto the table and slightly towards Taylor as she waited for the reply intently.

"Well..." Taylor ate a little bite of sweet potato. "I just... Didn't really sleep at all. I ran ropes at like three in the morning and then I was just kind of up... I laid on the couch and looked at like, Twitter and stuff."

She shrugged, and quietly ate another bite. "Hey," she looked up. "Why are you tired?"

Alaina shift in her chair and began to giggle quietly. "I never had you figured for a twitter type. I don't even have an account or know how to send twits, or whatever they are." Alaina said in a clear but quiet voice. "I don't know how ya do it though, I couldn't run ropes like that in the early morning just because I can't sleep. Then again I guess thats why you are as good as you are and I have a long ways to go."

"Eh, I know someone going through some tough times and they were out drinking. I got a call for a ride at 2 or 3 or so, and I went out to pick h..them up." Alaina said. She didn't want to air any of Charlie's issues in front of someone he wasn't friends with even if Taylor was likely to figure out who she was talking about. "Of course, the workout plan you have me on is always tiring as it should be."

"Oh, that's cool. Good that you could be there for 'em." Taylor made a hill out of her sweet potato with her spoon and then mashed the top like a volcano.

"I've really been over training too much lately... Which is just as bad as under training. I know better, but like, I can't stop. I just can't slow down because I get to thinking about stuff, and I only can really put it out of my head when my body is going." She pulled her phone out and stuck it on the table. "I don't really use Twitter either, but Morg showed me this thing... Do you know about this? During the last match, this against all odds hashtaggy thing was like... trending or whatever. It's... I dunno how I feel about it."

She thoughtfully ate some potato, swallowed, and then started again. "Hey, you're a nurse, right? Like... Could I ask you about what happened last night?"

Alaina looked Taylor in the eye as she listened to what her mentor was saying. She smiled as best she could, sensing a measure of unease in Taylor's voice and body language. "I heard about that. Its because people know you are at the top of your game regardless of whether or not you have some big gold thing holding your pants up." Alaina said, trying to make a joking reference to the title. Taylor then asked Alaina about the previous night.

"Of course! Ask away Taylor." Alaina said, already trying to put together what could have been wrong in her mind. Based on what she heard about last night from Julia to what she observed here it wasn't anything physical. Taylor's problems seemed to stem from anxiety as far as Alaina could tell. Instead of speaking she kept her mouth shut, wanting to hear what Taylor had to say.

"Okay, well, like..." Taylor's spoon lingered in her left hand, but she had completely forgotten about her food. "I was just in bed and stuff, and I remember having a little trouble sleeping. I figured it was because I had had a bunch to drink during the day, and I don't usually do that. And then out of nowhere I woke up in the middle of the night and I couldn't breathe at all. Like... I felt like I was suffocating, and my heart was pounding, and Julia came in, and..."

She trailed off, staring absently down at the table before she looked up at Alaina with an almost childlike expression. "Could that be asthma, do you think? That's all I know that does that, but there's no way I have that, so..." By the slight quiver in her eyebrow, the concern in her blue eyes, Taylor was holding out hope for an explanation that would make everything okay.

Alaina listened and thought she had a good idea as to what happened. The biggest problem now was presenting this to Taylor. Alaina knew Taylor was the type who didn't want to look weak or admit weakness. None of what Alaina wanted to say was meant to make her do that either... even if it didn't sound like great news by any means.

"Taylor, you have a lot on your mind and it sounds to me like you had a panic attack.  Now, before you can say anything it doesn't make anyone 'crazy' or whatever. A lot of people go through stuff that give them anxiety issues.  Don't let that stupid bitch Kelly Conjob get in your head.  Her ever winning anything is a scam.  Everyone knows you are the best, and we don't need you wearing a belt to see it."  Alaina said, hoping that some of that might clarify things.  She really hoped she didn't make things worse for Taylor.

She let what she said sink in a bit before continuing.  "I know things have been weighing on you.  We can all see it.  Knowing you, pride keeps you from really saying a lot of things which leads to things getting bottled up.  Mental fatigue is just like pressure in a bottle of soda. You can shake it up, and it stays inside but if you don't relieve some of that pressure from time to time it leads to an explosion."  Alaina paused again for a moment, realizing that she probably sounded super chatty.  She wanted to get a message across, and it wasn't a simple one.  At the same time she didn't want to sound judgemental.

She took a breath before continuing.  "I know you hate being still or not working towards something, and its easy to tell someone to relax, but just try your best to do things that are calming.  Like, I hate losing too.  I never sleep as well and I tend to dwell on it, beating myself up for doing so poorly.  Sometimes you just have to take a step back ya know?"