You Can Never Go Home Again

The question only made Cassie sob heavily into Akashi again. She couldn't bring herself to tell her the details, but even so she'd learn them soon enough. It was too horrible!

"Akashi, I don't want to go!" She wailed, and her little body was racked with more sobbing.

After a moment, she quieted down enough and after a couple halting breaths she drew back to stand in front of her friend. She kept her chin tucked down bashfully, and glanced up at Akashi with her eyes. "Akashi, do you think, if I had to go back to Canada, do you think you could come with me?" She asked, with such sincere hopefulness that it was utterly heartbreaking.

"But..." Akashi said when her question only brought more tears. That wasn't supposed to happen! She hugged Cassie tightly again but this time her own tears streaked down her face. She just couldn't help it now.

When Cassie pulled away, Akashi tilted her head. Y-you're going to visit your family. I.. of course I'd come with!" She said. Her widened eyes caused more tears to drip down her cheeks? "But... why are we crying?!" He voice cracked when she spoke. She was bewildered right now.

Cassie shook her head. "N-no..." She sniffled. "If I lose my match at Avalanche, I have to go home! Talia... made it that way."

Her shoulders slumped and she bowed her head, she seemed to shrink into herself. "I want to be with my family, but... You and Taylor and... Johnny, and everyone, if I lose I'll never see you again!" She closed her eyes and buried her face in her hands and stood still while tears silently ran down her face.

Akashi shook her head at Cassie's words. "No..." She whispered. Now the tears that streamed fell consciously instead of as a response to Cassie's tears. "T-That's not right at all!" Akashi said. She grabbed Cassie's shoulders and gave her a small shake. "Why?! Why are you even having a match with her again!? You kicked her ass! She needs to... go away SHE needs to go away! Not you! Not you, Cassie-chan! Why would you agree to those stipulations?"

Akashi blubbered but shook her head and mashed her palm against her face to fling tears off it. "But... " Akashi said and then grabbed Cazssie tightly again, kneeling down to look her int he face. "You're not going anywhere! You're going to win so there's no reason to get upset at all! Hai!" She said, forcing a smile. "You're going to be rid of her for good. That's it, you know? You're Cassie-san! Y-you can beat anyone!'

Cassie sank and stared down at the floor. "No..." She said, barely holding back another round of tears. "I'm going to lose, I know it. She... she beat me up worse than anyone else twice already, and I just got lucky last time. And I know she's not going to fight fair. She never does. She'll just hit me with a pipe or something like she did before and get away with it and I'll be back in Canada in no time."

She closed her eyes, and hot tears again ran down her cheeks. She saw it now, the reason why Talia would even demand that stipulation. "Akashi, she's taken my whole life away. Now she's trying to take away my job and my dream and my friends so I have to go home, but... it won't even be the same as it used to be after all this. It'll never be the same again. She took it."

Akashi's eyes widened and she stepped back. She stared at Cassie like she was looking at an alien. She might as well have been. "N-no!"

Akashi said and clenched her fists tightly. "NO1" She said loudly, stamping her foot on the ground. "I don't care if you win lose or draw. I don't care if ... anything..." Akashi said and looked at Cassie. "You're going to be my friend forever. No matter what. Nothing that happens will ever keep me from loving or caring about you or trying to do everything in my power to make sure you're happy. I don't care if you were destined to lose, if you're being set up or anything like that. I'll be there for you no matter what. Everyone here will be. But..." Akashi said, lowering her head, crying again.

She grabbed Cassie's cheeks and held them tightly. "Whatever you you do, please, PLEASE, I'm begging you, don't give up before that bell sounds. You can't. You just can't take anything with you after the match. Promise me, Cassie-chan. I'm begging you.... promise me you'll put every last ounce of your soul into that match. And then... if she still wins, we'll figure out what to do... together. All of us."

Akashi pulled Cassie into a tight hug and squeezed like Cassie might disappear forever if she didn't.

Cassie took long deep breaths, as much as Akashi's grip would allow, and stared off into space. She didn't hug her back. She was miles away.

She shook her head. "No, she'll win. Of course she will. All I can do is fight fair, and who knows what she'll do to me to make sure I lose. Her or her sister would be waiting for me every time I leave the house, and... I don't even care any more. It's not worth it. They can do whatever they want, but... I'm really scared."

She clenched her fists and her voice rose to an uneven shout. "And you're talling me that I have to put everything into the fight, but I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT HER! I NEVER DID!" Her voice broke, and she was crying again. "She was supposed to come over to my old apartment. I was going to make dinner, and Mamouru was there..." Her voice caught on his name, but she continued. "And then the next time I saw her, she was standing over Taylor with a chair, and she was..."

She let herself fall against Akashi when her legs would no longer support her. "Akashi, what did I do wrong? Why did things turn out like this? I just... I wasn't good enough. I'm not a good enough friend, and Talia hates me for it, and now I have nothing left. Soon, anyway. I wish I were dead. I hope she kills me."

Akashi's natural instinct after Cassie was finished was to try and shake all these negative feelings out if her. To yell at her and tell her she can't think that way at all. But when Cassie collapsed against her Akashi cradled her loosely and gently stroked her pretty orange hair.

"Oh, Cassie-chan." Akashi whispered. " I wish I had the answers. I wish I had some magical potion to make everything better. I don't know about anyone else but i don't think you were a bad friend to anyone. All I know is you're a better friend than I deserve. If you were to leave, I don't know what I would do. If you died, I'd be dead too. My heart already has too many holes in it. I know it's a selfish thing to say but please... please don't make another one"

Akashi buried her face in Cassie's neck and began to sob uncontrollably. Before she was just crying. Now she was loudly crying and clinging to Cassie.

"You're a better friend than anyone could hope for! Uwaahh... Casie-hic-chan! I want to take your tears away. No more of them. Whatever happens, I... I'll stay by your side. Even.. even if you have to go back to Canada. Even if you die!"

Cassie wrapped her arms around Akashi's big body and gave her a squeeze back. "Oh, Akashi..." She just wanted to be held, for a long, long time.

For Akashi to be sobbing as violently as she was should've been upsetting, but somehow it wasn't. Cassie patted Akashi's back, and without thinking about it said "It's okay, Akashi. It'll be okay. I'll..." She paused. Even if she won, she'd still be taking something away from Talia, and that didn't feel right either. But it didn't feel right to just let Talia take whatever she wanted from her, either. "I'll try. I'll really try my best."

She held onto her, and had no intention of letting go. The two held each other up, and if one were to let go they both would fall. Cassie just wanted to hold Akashi up.

She whispered, so quietly, "[size=85:g8htbkbv]Thank you."