Re: Confessions

[Bluemouse]

[confessionbear] I think confessions about personal problems with a board member shouldn't be made public on the board. [/confessionbear]

[Jizzelle]

That's sooooooooooooo last week.

[TheWamts]

[quote="Jilly":gp0kkl3b]/r/tightsqueeze. Bit obscure but it hit 6k subscribers a few weeks ago

That explains your avvy.

theWamts.unsolvedMysteries--;

[Jilly]

Eh, yes and no " title="Razz" /> The avy's cause I like stucks...the sub's for stuff like

[Alexandra]

I'm sick of life. This year has been nothing but bad to me so far. I'm tired of people walking all over me like I have a doormat stuck to my face. I'm tired of people trying to use me. I'm sick and damn tired of trying to be nice to everyone and tolerant towards everyone and trying to help people who need it only for it to come back and bite me in the ass. I'm just sick and damn tired of everything. I'm more depressed now then I've ever been before in my life. I'm just tired of it all. I just want to know when I'm finally going to get my chance to be happy. I've been waiting 28 years now and it still hasn't happened yet. At this point I doubt it ever will.

I want to give up. I just want to throw in the towel and give up on everything. But fuck it. I'll just keep on putting on a happy face and keep trying to make everyone else happy, just like I always do. Not like I can fucking do anything else. At least the other people I know will be happy, so that's something, I guess. :/

[kamina_tamotsu]

Erm....well....perhaps I've gone on abit too long without putting something here but ....I got some confessions.

For while now, maybe since last September, I felt like I don't really am part of the AFW community. I guess rightfully so.... My two male characters are part of mainly what is a sideshow...and I don't feel competent enough with my female character to be accepting matches for her left and right. I also don't post regularly....But... I've been really wanting to get back get into everything. However, when I try....it doesn't seem like anybody is there.

I guess I should explain. My perception of the forum has mainly been that of rejection. First off, I don't really have many friends on here. I have yahoo messenger, but I feel like I should even bother iming the people I have on there. I've feel like I'm looked at strangely at just for pming someone "Hi, How are you doing?" Like what....are we not suppose to do that or something? Most of the people I've asked through PM about getting a match together have either turned me down for a variety of reasons, mainly because they don't do Tension, or don't reply at all. Call me self-centered if you want, but you can see what they may have on my perception of the forum. Its happened to me enough times over the last couple of months and Its gotten to a point where I feel like no one wants to rp with me. And I don't know why..... Is it me? Do I suck at roleplaying? Is it my characters? Lots of questions....All of which go mainly unanswered....Geez its so bad that the few matches that have come my way I just turn down.

I also have a sense that some people on here just don't like. I suppose thats to be expected but....it makes it harder for me to even ask people for a match anymore.

So I guess the short of it is, I don't know what to do. I wanna have cool storylines like i've seen other people have for their characters. I just don't feel like I can do that here.... " title="Sad" />

[Jizzelle]

Sorry to break up the pity party but I have a confession.


I know for a fact that everyone on this forum loves me. I'm not insecure about shit. Also, the person on the first page of this is impersonating me because I'm not insecure about anything.

[XSirenX]

[quote="Alexandra":9ase3nuv]I'm sick of life. This year has been nothing but bad to me so far. I'm tired of people walking all over me like I have a doormat stuck to my face. I'm tired of people trying to use me. I'm sick and damn tired of trying to be nice to everyone and tolerant towards everyone and trying to help people who need it only for it to come back and bite me in the ass. I'm just sick and damn tired of everything. I'm more depressed now then I've ever been before in my life. I'm just tired of it all. I just want to know when I'm finally going to get my chance to be happy. I've been waiting 28 years now and it still hasn't happened yet. At this point I doubt it ever will.

I want to give up. I just want to throw in the towel and give up on everything. But fuck it. I'll just keep on putting on a happy face and keep trying to make everyone else happy, just like I always do. Not like I can fucking do anything else. At least the other people I know will be happy, so that's something, I guess. :/

Cool story Alex~

[hamish1024]

ALEX - Shit, man. Hope you donâ€t mind some insight, you can take or leave it. Niceness and tolerance arenâ€t a means to an end. They are their own thing. The alternative is being a dick. You should think better of yourself for not being a dick.

Now, granted, lots of successful, happy, fulfilled people are also colossal dicks. But correlation does not equal causation, and becoming a dick will not make you more happy. Unless, deep down, you were always a dick.

(man, I have typed ‘dick†a lot, which is weird for me because I donâ€t RP in Tension).

You want your chance to be happy? Well, I follow a broadly Buddhist philosophy, in that the very act of wanting something is the cause of all unhappiness. If you can teach yourself to stop wanting things, youâ€ll actually stop being unhappy. (I realise this is almost the same as you saying you want to give up on everything. But it's a nicer, calmer, more rational way of giving up.) If you were only being nice and tolerant in the expectation of getting something in return, then youâ€re in trouble. You might have to get your zen on. Or become a dick.

[hamish1024]

[quote="kamina_tamotsu":1wjtqkpu]Erm....well....perhaps I've gone on abit too long without putting something here but ....I got some confessions.

For while now, maybe since last September, I felt like I don't really am part of the AFW community. I guess rightfully so.... My two male characters are part of mainly what is a sideshow...and I don't feel competent enough with my female character to be accepting matches for her left and right. I also don't post regularly....But... I've been really wanting to get back get into everything. However, when I try....it doesn't seem like anybody is there.

I guess I should explain. My perception of the forum has mainly been that of rejection. First off, I don't really have many friends on here. I have yahoo messenger, but I feel like I should even bother iming the people I have on there. I've feel like I'm looked at strangely at just for pming someone "Hi, How are you doing?" Like what....are we not suppose to do that or something? Most of the people I've asked through PM about getting a match together have either turned me down for a variety of reasons, mainly because they don't do Tension, or don't reply at all. Call me self-centered if you want, but you can see what they may have on my perception of the forum. Its happened to me enough times over the last couple of months and Its gotten to a point where I feel like no one wants to rp with me. And I don't know why..... Is it me? Do I suck at roleplaying? Is it my characters? Lots of questions....All of which go mainly unanswered....Geez its so bad that the few matches that have come my way I just turn down.

I also have a sense that some people on here just don't like. I suppose thats to be expected but....it makes it harder for me to even ask people for a match anymore.

So I guess the short of it is, I don't know what to do. I wanna have cool storylines like i've seen other people have for their characters. I just don't feel like I can do that here.... " title="Sad" />

Ok, tough love. Firstly, yes, no-one likes tension, so that does put you on the back foot. Secondly, yes, it is weird to PM people just to say hi (although I'm British, and we reject friendliness in all its forms, so that could just be me). Thirdly, matches are a lot of effort, and a lot of people on this forum aren't actually very good at them all the time (myself included) - and shit matches are a waste of time - so people are going to be very reluctant to invest time in something where, chances are, they won't get anything out of it.

So yeah, you are being self centered. Don't just PM "Hi" or "Wanna match?". Post in notice board, i.e. where people actually look when they want matches. And if you want storylines, great, but do some of the work in advance so people know they're not wasting their time. Characters? Content? Competitive or clusterfuck? Post match ideas and potential plots that you are looking for participants in.

I'll be honest, I don't even know if you are one of those one-line RP people who just ask "wanna match?" repeatedly and have no-dimensional characters. I'm mainly venting at them. You might be exempt.

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