(-PROMO-) Zebra Woman's New Vegetable (Feat. Maria Cacti)

The familiar music track blared on, and already boos were being hurled. There were some cheers but mostly negative reactions from the crowd for the heel who was about to walk down the ramp.

The crowd stuck thumbs downs as Zebra strutted onto the ramp, with the confident swaggering strut of someone who owns the place. She had a boisterous smile, as she stomped her way down the ramp, looking at the crowds before tossing her long thick ponytail in their direction with a "Hah!", as if to show their boos meant nothing to her, she was here anyways and she was very confident. As usual.

After coming down the ramp, Zebra rolled into the ring, before stepping in center stage, galloping a bit like a Zebra before coming to a stop. She was surrounded by boos and jeers on all sides. She seemed to drink the negativity in, before the referee handed her a mic. Zebra sneered, "Well well well! Look who came back, and with ALL their hair intact." She flipped her long ponytail back, which was met with resounding boos. Nobody liked what happened to poor Renegade's hairdo.

"Aww, come on! What you all complaining about, SHE made the whole demand and scene, not me! I just wanted to pound her, but SHE was like," and Zebra pulled her hand up in a mouth motion, " 'Aw you gotta shave, you need a haircut!' " Well SUCKS TO GET A HAIRCUT, BITCH!" Zebra threw her head back in laughter, again met with boos. Some in the audience wondered what was the reason she was here for even. She even pulled an electric razor out of her belt to brandish and show the audience.

And it was at that point that someone in the audience nearest to the ring yelled through a paper megaphone, "You suck!"

Zebra heard the dude and scoffed.

The guy continued, "You didn't deserve that win!"

Zebra sniggered.

"And your diet is gay!"

If a gunshot had gone off, that would've been what it felt like to the dude for a second as he saw Zebra suddenly swivel her head in his direction, a look of pure fury suddenly growing on it. She slowly walked up to the ring ropes, facing the guy who slowly lowered his megaphone though there was no point to that because she had seen him. She glared at the dude (who was only in the second row), as she said loudly, "What the FUCK did you just say, about my diet?" The guy, now sweating a bit, looked left and right, before looking at Zebra who hopped over the top rings and did a 3 point landing on the ground, before walking up to the barrier, as the nearest fans slowly leaned back in their seats, to try to stay out of reach of the angry amazon in front of them. The guy's eyes were transfixed to Zebra's mask, as she snorted, "You wanna say that to my face again, noodle?"

The guy slowly raised his megaphone again, before saying through it, "Uh...you suck?"

Zebra pointed an accusing finger at him, lifting the microphone up to her mouth angrily as she yelled, "THE FUCK YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, DIPSHIT! You wanna fuckin' go?! You saw me demolish that little shit, Renegade, in ONE. CLEAN. KICK. You got THAT on your damn skillset? NO! Renee's like every normie out here," with that she waved her hand to refer to the wider audience, "And SHE fucking got SLAPPED. Doesn't matter what ya eat, its all about the gains! And YET, people have the fuckin GALL to come and make fun of people like me! Just for what we eat?! Why don't you get back on fuckin' Youtube and watch those fat Koreans get fat eating cock noodles, HA HEY!" she guffawed.

The audience started to legit wonder if her diet was really this sensitive a topic to Zebra Woman, because this seemed really pathetic of her, getting this worked up over one guy making a remark on her diet.

Suddenly, someone’s music started playing. It sounded very childlike and before long, the lyrics were said and the crowd would get the mystery wrestler’s theme song stuck in their head.

Then outcame a very young looking girl wearing something that represented a cactus. She was feeling all giddy as she skipped down the ramp. The crowd already hated her for the earworm of a theme song as she slid into the ring and stood toe to toe with Zebra Woman. She was also given a mic as she smiled at Zebra Woman.

“Hallå Zebra Woman. Wow. You look very big in person. And the colors of black and white really make you look like a zebra. Oh. I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Maria Cacti. Can you spell my name for me?”

Maria Cacti was pretty much annoying at the get go. She was leaning on the vibes of those obnoxious childrens YouTubers that parents play on their kid’s iPad to keep them quiet. And with a stadium full of adults, they already couldn’t stand the very friendly and patronizing young lady.

The arrival of what seemed like a small child at first on change left Zebra confused.

When the music changed, she had to quickly hop back into the ring, expecting a fight about to start and wanted to stay ready. So being met with a short woman in what looked like a cactus themed outfit was not what she was mentally ready for. She was also weirdly peppy and energetic for how suddenly she had come, because Zebra didn't remember this being mentioned for today. That music she was using was awfully ear wormy.

As she got closer, the height difference became significant and Zebra had to crane her head to look down at Maria and make eye contact with her. Her question was a flashbang. Zebra's mouth opened, before asking, "....wha...? Is...is this a trick question, like you put K in Cacti to look cooler on paper and you're trying to joke with me here?"

Zebra was already feeling annoyed here by Maria, as she wiped her eyes before asking, "Who, who even are you? What do you want?"

Maria looked up at Zebra Woman and smiled at her. She then placed the mic near her mouth and sweetly continued conversations with Zebra Woman.

“Oh it’s not a trick question, Ms. Zebra. In fact. Let’s spell out my name. M A R I A. C A C T I! And I am your new friend. I’m here because I want to help you bring love and joy to the AFW. To tell kids all around the globe that eating greens and vegetables is the right way to keep in shape.”

Maria posed for the camera recording both wrestlers as she leaned back and did a thumbs up. Was Maria, recording an episode for her YouTube Channel? Is this woman a child’s entertainer?

Maria had this weird energy to her that made Zebra very conflicted. On one hand, she wanted to punt her out of the ring right now because she was pissing her off internally. She gave an energy of "Little Shit" and Zebra was very tempted to punt her like a football. But on the other hand, there was something very curiosity raising about this strange little woman too. She was so....weird. And Zebras curiosity wanted to see more of her and who the heck was she.

As Maria spelled out her name, and proceeded to name off why she was here and how Zebra "brought love and joy", she narrowed her eyes as her upper lip raised in a face of "WTF". Zebra was known for many things, she had been called many things. "Bringing joy and love" was NOT on those lists and she wondered if Maria was drunk. The latter part of the statement, she was very sure that was a super fast way to get every kid on the planet to hate you in 3 seconds tops. Maybe 5. Because she could already see kids in the crowd looking at the two of them disprovingly.

Zebra looked carefully back at Maria as she posed for a camera, giving a laid back thumbs up. Rubbing her chin, she said, "I, think you got the wrong person. I'm not known for bringing....love and joy, really, kinda the opposite, I'm known for making people angry." she waved an arm disapprovingly, "And you DO realize telling kids to eat their vegetables makes you world enemy number 1 on a public live feed to the world like this?! They're not gonna appreciate that!" to which a thought came into her mind, "Heck, they might even petition you to fight some super tough fighter JUST to watch you get trounced, kid." Despite her dismissive tone and brash delivery, Zebra internally on the inside (the true person) was genuinely concerned for Maria here. She wasn't sure who she was but she was already getting a bad feeling about this.