Drinks Debut! - Drake Mallory vs Ninjette

Hardcore Tables Match
Victory Conditions: Gained by putting your opponent through a table.
Bottles of liquor are left beneath the ring. In various sizes and brands, they are free to use in addition to any other weapons one may come across.

There were a lot of things he should be feeling right now. He should be feeling anxious. There was a tremendous crowd wailing outside, and it was one of those “anything goes” matches, as management so eloquently putting. He should be feeling worried. For all he knew, he would be going up against one of those six-foot tall behemoths he saw tearing it up at the gym. He should be feeling happy. It was his debut and would be entering among some of the best fighters around, and the money would get him some semblance of his life back on track, win or lose.

Drake Mallory:

And yet, for Drake Mallory, he felt nothing but that belch working its way out of his stomach.

BELCH!

There it was. Now he was in the mood.

“Ha, classy.” He was looking himself over in the mirror, finishing up taping his hands. “Alriiight, captain. Looking strong, looking strong.” Wait, was he facing a man? Eh, still works. He let a few fists fly before making his way out the door.

“Might buy me a house after this. Or a woman. Hmm, dang. Not many of those ‘round here. Kinda famished, though. Maybe I’ll- *hick* I’ll get some food. Nah, better grab a pint, fill the tank, and head home. Oh, I don’t have a home. Shite. Wait, I’ll buy a house.”

Couldn't help getting ahead of himself. The hefty amount of alcohol Drake had just gone through was working its way through him, even though he already had a decent buzz going on. It was doing its job well too. Any nerves or thoughts he might have had going into this were far away from his mind. Soon they’d be pissing out of him, but hopefully after the match. Not that he would have been nervous, but the attention was always just a little bit distracting. He was used to doing this in the back streets and alleys, with not a single light or unwanted pair of eyes to be seen in those corners.

Now, he was at the center of the world, yet couldn’t feel any less worried. Walking a bit awkwardly through the halls, he made his way to the gorilla position. When he heard his music chime in and the lights flash on, a sense of bewilderment overtook him. So this is what success looked like.

Nope, he fell flat on his face. There were a quite a few laughs, until he didn’t get right back up. He was a heavy guy, who felt heavy, and wasn’t really grasping the situation. Also his mind was flushed with liquor. Not a good motivator. Taking another couple seconds, he tucked his knees and pushed forward, using the slope of the ramp to roll forward and pop onto his feet. Throwing his hands up, the crowd let out another cheer, assuming he was boasting. He was just trying to stay balanced.

Hurrying down the ramp, he jumped tumbled into the ring, banging his foot a bit on the side. He’d regret not wearing shoes in the morning. Getting up onto his feet, Drake went to his corner and...which one was his corner? Okay, he just went to the opposite side of the ring and leaned his arms over the top ropes. Should he stretch? Maybe do a few push ups? Instead, a sloppy smile overtook his face as he waited for his opponent to make their entrance. This was going to be the worst stupor of his life. Drake couldn’t feel it though.

”’Hardcore Tables Match.’”

Kozue was in the back, hanging in the gorilla position, waiting for her turn to be called out to the ring. Usually, she’d just hang around, chat with the stagehands, maybe play some Pac-Man on her phone. Today, she had a little reading to do. She knew going in that she’d been facing some new guy, but she’d only been given the stipulation card just now, and, well…

”’Victory conditions, gained by putting your opponent through a table. Bottles of liquor are left beneath the ring. In various sizes and brands…” She took a pause, pondering what that might have included.Would they really go to the trouble of importing some stuff? “...they are free to use in addition to any other weapons one may come across.”

Kozue had already read it once to herself, and now she was just reading it out loud so her brain could be absolutely sure it wasn’t misinterpreting this. A match that involved violence, tables, and alcohol? She didn’t who the crazed lunatic was that came up with this idea, but she absolutely loved him.

On another note, this eerily reminded Kozue of her own debut match, where she’d challenged King - the biggest, meanest, rapiest motherfucker in Tension - to a contest where  you had to take a shot everytime you got pinned, where the first person to pass out lost. Easily the dumbest idea she’d ever had.

Hopefully this would go better than that.

A few moments later and Kozue was coming out to her theme music, shuffling down to ring with a bounce in her hips. Typically she’d just roll into the ring and greet her opponent, but before that happened, she needed to verify a few things.

”Let’s see, let’s see, let us see.” She lifted up the apron and sure enough, there were bottles waiting for her perusal. Mostly local brews, but there were some decent imports mixed. ”Well, you are a long way from home.”

She sntached up a Lone Star - a decent Texas beer, if she remembered right from her time in Dallas - and rolled on into the ring to face her opponent for the night. A guy, pretty big and buff looking, sturdy. Should make for a good fight. ”Hey, Mallory.” Kozue nodded his way and strolled over, as she started working the bottle cap off. ”They’re starting you off with a bang, huh?”

Drake snapped out his little slump when he heard someone’s theme music playing. Someone was making their way down the stage, his vision was a little too blurry to tell. And it hurt to try and focus. Forget it. He just went to leaned right back and tilted his head back up slightly, waiting for them to come to him for their little meet and greet. He could already tell from the way the crowd was getting pumped up that whoever they were was a fan favorite.

Hearing the thump, Drake realized his opponent was in the ring. His eyes shifted down a bit, trying to get some details. Short shorts. A top. Long hair. That was all he was really getting. His mind was pretty swimy, as per usual, but he could still register the greeting. It was a simple one, the kind he liked.

“Hello...you.” He hadn’t remembered to learn much about this match, including who he was facing. Never did him much good anyway.

“Hmmm? Bang?” He looked his opponent up and down. Mostly down. Toned, probably nimble, thin arms, legs could be dangerous. But she was still down there. An awkward smirk crawled onto his face. “If that’s what you wanna call it. Notin’ new ta me though. No holds barred is always how I settle things. Rules in a scrap? Psshhh. Still, all that’s missing is a good bottle of-”

His thoughts came to a close when he that ever so familiar snap and noticed the bottle’s cap loosen. Pushing a bit closer, he could just make out the faint scent coming out of the bottle. That little smirk slowly made its way into a grin.

“Oi, shortie. Where’dya get that? You can bring drinks in here? They patted me high and low on the way down here.” He stopped for a moment, taking another look back at her. “Oooohhhh, you’re one of them fuckin’ ninjas ain'tcha? Sneaky little git. You’re my new best friend. Give it a toss, will ya?”

He held his hand up, beckoning for a swig. If she didn’t give it, he was just gonna take it honestly. That stuff looked interesting. Still, in the back of his souped mind, he couldn’t help but appreciate the setting a little.

Drinks. Fighting. Money. And it was legal. This place was starting to look up.

As Drake spoke, Kozue didn’t say anything. She didn’t even move all that much, really, except to bob her head from side to side, occasionally lifting her eyebrows and squinting his way, trying to get a good read on this man before her. He seemed...off. Even by the loopy standards set by the average Tension male.

Kozue wouldn’t call herself smart. Not exactly. She’d graduated high school, but nothing beyond that and she wasn’t exactly an honor roll student by any stretch of the imagination.

But if there was one thing she knew, it was drunk men. And, unless her finely honed senses were deceiving her, this man was stone drunk. Pissed. Krunk. Blitzed. Shit-faced. Three-sheets-to-the-wind.

This was new. Kozue wasn’t sure if he admired this man or was embarrassed for him.

Either way, though, he was absolutely not getting the bottle she’d picked out. Not when she hadn’t had a single sip, yet.

”Ah-ah. You didn't say the magic word.” Kozue nimbly hopped out of his reach, held up a finger with one hand used the other to start chugging hard, lifting it up full tilt to let the contents stream down her throat. Just a little more...and a little more…and a little more...

It sounded like she said something. But if Drake was being honest, he didn’t hear it. He was too distracted by that liquor she was tempting him ever so much with. His mind was focused on little else and he didn’t even care.

The lights were hot and beaming down on him. Everyone was looking at and talking about the two of them. Anticipation was riding high in the air. For most people, that was enough to motivate and deliver a good performance. Not this brawler. All it did was make him parched.

“Well, be quick about it.” There was a rudeness in his voice, clearly ignoring whatever Kozue had just implied to him.

His head was tilted slightly towards his raised arm as he kept waggling it in the air. Then all of a sudden, she hopped away and made some fair distance away from him in the blink of an eye. Drake’s delayed mind caught up a couple seconds later when he looked back up at his fleeting challenger. His eyes narrowed as he looked on at her, lips pursed and eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Then she started drinking the bottle in front of him. Plus, she was downing it at an unusually fast rate.

Ah, nevermind. This girl sucks.

“H-hey! Don’t drink it all! That’s too big for you!”

With that he lunged forward, hurrying towards his nimble opponent before she could finish drinking the rest of the brew. Reaching one arm out for the bottle, and another out for her shoulder to keep her from moving away. That hop was looked like just a taste of her speed, and while most of her abilities were lost on Drake, he could at least register that she was fast. He couldn’t let her slip away like that again. Not until he got that swig. And few people got between him and a good swig.

Good flavor. A little more spritzy than she typically liked her drinks, like it had some soda mixed in, but not so much that it didn’t go down smooth and soothing all the way. Hint of cinnamon? Yeah, definitely.

Kozue was a woman who enjoyed her drinks at a nigh-spiritual level, and she was doing just that right now. Telling by the way Mallory reacted, he had some objections to that.

Well. Too bad. She saw it first. If he wanted one, he could get his own. Easily, since there were literally free drinks all over the place.

She kept on chugging, even as he went from mildly perturbed to genuinely pissed off. She had a feeling he wasn’t going to let that stand for too long, and sure enough he lunged at her, going for both her shoulder and her drink. Two mistakes at once.

She took a step back and pulled the drink away from her lips to say a single word. ”Nope.”

Quick and calm, she ducked under his incoming arms, spun around to deliver a quick, tripping kick to his ankles, and popped out behind him, moving in one smooth deft motion.

In his flushed mind, that quick duck she made under his arm seemed more like a blur. She really was a ninja. Phasing out of existence in front of his eyes like that, Drake just kept his eyes in front of him as he tried to slow down. But then something tripped him up, and he came tumbling forward all the way to the ropes. Bouncing back off them, he stumbled right backwards and onto his back, looking up at the ceiling. He looked left. He looked right. His opponent was still gone. Someone chuckled. This was going well so far.

Women were always giving him the runaround, sure, but that was never before the drink. And she was the one doing all the drinking. This was unusual. Very unusual. He looked up and saw his opponent, standing away from him with the drink still in her hands.

“Hmmmm.”

He was still on his back when let out that groan. Aw, man. She made some pretty decent dents in that bottle.

He pursed his lips again, thinking about how he should go about this. There was clearly an obstacle between him and his drink, so that had to go first. But she was quick and, from what little he got, kicked like a mule. Maybe this just needs a different approach. Can’t fight the current. You just gotta go with it. Like sneaking up on a startled animal. Yeah, that’s it. Ease up, give it a good pet, and it’ll show you some affection.

This very zig-zagged line of thinking was what Drake settled on. Flipping over and holding his hands up innocently, he inched closer and closer to Kozue. He would lower them inch by inch as he got closer to her, and more importantly, the liquor. Who knows, maybe it will work?

“Easy, now. I’m not gonna hurt’cha. That’s right. Thaaat’s right. Ders a good boy. Who’s a good boy? That’s right. It’s you. That’s right.”

Nope, not in a million fucking years.

The referee had been watching this whole thing, clearly confused on what she should be doing, on whether this was the actual match or just pre-fight silliness. This was a weird, unorthodox match to begin with, and the participants, well…

...they weren’t making it any less so.

Whether the match was official or not, Kozue was having a good time already. This was the reason she stayed in Tension, despite getting the occasional offer to jump ship - she loved messing with boys. Girls could be fun, too, but rarely did she wind up with stuff like this.

”And they call me a lush.” She muttered and took another swig, as Mallory made his way back up and started coming her way. Very…very...slowly.

She canted her head, snickered, and did her best not to full out laugh. She wondered if he was really drunk or if it was just a Drunken Fist sort of thing, like he was putting it on to lull her into a false sense of security. If it was the latter, he was going way above the call of duty. If it was the former, she’d almost feel a little bad for taking advantage.

Almost.

She waited until he was close enough, then turned to the side, stepped towards him, and brought her leg up to shoot out with a Superkick towards his head.

Whether it connected or not, the referee was ringing the bell. Fight’s on.
The referee had been watching this whole thing, clearly confused on what she should be doing, on whether this was the actual match or just pre-fight silliness. This was a weird, unorthodox match to begin with, and the participants, well…

...they weren’t making it any less so.

Whether the match was official or not, Kozue was having a good time already. This was the reason she stayed in Tension, despite getting the occasional offer to jump ship - she loved messing with boys. Girls could be fun, too, but rarely did she wind up with stuff like this.

”And they call me a lush.” She muttered and took another swig, as Mallory made his way back up and started coming her way. Very…very...slowly.

She canted her head, snickered, and did her best not to full out laugh. She wondered if he was really drunk or if it was just a Drunken Fist sort of thing, like he was putting it on to lull her into a false sense of security. If it was the latter, he was going way above the call of duty. If it was the former, she’d almost feel a little bad for taking advantage.

Almost.

She waited until he was close enough, then turned to the side, stepped towards him, and brought her leg up to shoot out with a Superkick towards his head.

Whether it connected or not, the referee was ringing the bell. Fight’s on.

Alright, it seemed to be working. She wasn’t bucking away and didn’t seemed threatened. She took another swig, but that was fine, it meant she was relaxed. He was getting closer and closer to that bottle when the kick caught him in the side of the head.

He went stumbling to the side. All of a sudden he was hearing bells. Bells ringing all around him. Whether it was the ringing in his own head or the sound of the fight getting underway, Drake wasn’t entirely sure. The only thing he knew for sure was that he was getting a fucking drink. One way or another. So as he took a little fumble to the side, he caught himself and reared his head right back up. A wry smile grew on his face as he met her eyes.

“So you like the razzle-dazzle, eh? Right then.” He raised his fists up, bouncing from side to side. “Lessgo, mozzie. Show me how you dance!”

Dashing towards the ninja, he drew his fist back and threw it forward, aiming for her head. That was, until the rest of the body went with him, and he went stumbling forward a little past his intended target. Oh, this is bad. No wait, good. Maybe? Yeah, yeah this could work.

Catching himself on one foot and flailing his arms about, he’d quickly spin around and whip his leg to hit his opponent in the side. Not exactly a subtle technique, but the movements were erratic enough to catch less sharp people off guard.

He remembered doing this once somewhere. Can’t remember exactly though, even less if it actually worked. How did it work out again?

Huh. He was still standing after that.

Kozue hopped away after the kick connected flush, genuinely surprised to see him still on his feet. Granted, that was just the first real move of the match, so it wasn’t like she had much damage to work with, but still, he tanked it a lot better than she would’ve imagined. All the sudden, she was getting a good idea of what sort of fighter Mallory was - he seemed to fit nicely into the whole ‘tank’ stereotype. And it probably helped that he was too drunk to feel a good deal of what she’d be dishing out.

So, playtime was over, then. Okay. ”Here.” She passed the bottle off to the referee, who gave her a raised eyebrow in return. ”Hold that for a minute.”

Mallory came at her a moment later, swinging hard and clumsy, a blow Kozue ducked under with childish ease. ”Just throwing this out there, dude.” She spun around behind him, bouncing on her heel. ”But maybe you shouldn’t get pissed before-”

Her suggestion was cut off when he struck out with a kick, one that was sharper and had better technique than she would’ve thought him capable of. The blow caught her in the side and sent her stumbling to the ropes, leaving her stunned for a moment as she leaned against them.

It seemed she had an actual match on her hands, now. Good to know.