Self Help

@Gwyndolin: First, let me just say that your pm's, and this reply, are typically of biblical scale. Being busy and worn out and losing my mind, I might not be able to remember to respond to every point you bring up in a message. I hope that you can understand that, and not take offense to it.

I'm glad you liked the DA-Cassie stuff. It did get very dark, and it got really hard to write. I have a lot of affection for Cassie, and to really crush her soul like that was hard to do.

I tried to explain a little bit in a pm that when we talked I was "stressed". It seemed like 100 people at once were coming out of the woodwork to tell me that I suck and Taylor sucks and my character sees Taylor as a shit-eating selfish bitch who doesn't give a shit. It was a bit much for me at the moment, so I apologize for being snippy. After having put so much effort into Taylor's almost 200 threads, to have people still just brush her off as something other than what I wrote her to be makes me feel like that time was all wasted.

And as for the thread ideas, I pitched an idea, neither of you were into it, so I said okay, scrap it, onto the next. No big deal. I find it a little difficult when people's thread ideas involve too much instruction for my character (like my character does this, and taylor thinks this and does this), in part because people have such a... maybe an "incomplete" idea of who Taylor is. That makes it tough. Plus, Taylor has things going on that are shaping her near future, so it's harder to commit to new things when she's in flux.

I do my best to try to keep my rp partners' interests in mind. In threads where people are brought in for smaller roles, support roles, to fill out the thread, obviously they don't get to be the center of it, but I think it's still good to provide color for a thread like that. I would love it if someone asked me to fill a side role in their thread.

Other than that, you're free to ask my match partners for their thoughts on how things went. Before doing a thread, I try to at least agree on the gist of how it'll go. Sometimes I try to hold back some surprises, because I like them and I like spontaneity, often much more than others... But it isn't like I would ever just bully someone into jobbing when they didn't want to or whatever. If anyone feels like that's happened, please pm me.

I spend time and effort concocting schemes that would lead to development and whatnot for other people's characters. The dojo is a thing now specifically to be able to do that. The coalition as a joint effort is as well. I don't think I've ever demanded something from someone and then snubbed them when they wanted something in return.

I really don't do much demanding. I always tell people that if they wouldn't have fun with something, then I don't want for them to do it. If they don't want to do it, we won't do it. I'm not interested in dragging people along. In bigger threads with lots of people, you have to be like a director to keep it together, but otherwise I try to give just enough of a guideline to keep the story in mind while giving people as much freedom as I can, which sometimes backfires.


@LARIATO: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. I know our threads so far have had Julia as a supporting character, and I'd like to be able to do more with you, it's just that stuff has been on hold for reasons I've already mentioned.

I can't think of a way to say much else without feeling like a little bitch, so just thanks. You're a good guy.

That's all pretty fair, so thanks for explaining it, Blue. Now that I know more about how you prefer to work, we might have better luck the next time we try to work out an RP together.

I'm glad you took the time to respond to me, and everyone else that replied. It definitely shows that you want to get better at what you do, not to mention the balls it takes to man up and make a thread like this.

Just wanted to re-reply to your reply...I don't even know what I'm saying. lol. Anyway here goes.

I definitely know how stressful life can be, and it's certainly tough to take a lot of stress in the day and not accidentally let it out on people. If any of my posts seemed a tad too pessimistic over the last month it's probably because I was dealing with the passing of my grandfather. No one is perfect, and it's certainly an issue that everyone has to work on to some extent.

You have been RPing with more people as of late, which is a good sign, I was just bringing to text the first thing that came to mind when I was reading this thread.

To finish, you're a great writer, which I said before, and while sometimes you seem a little stressed, abrasive was a good term everyone else used, I don't think anyone legitimately hates what you do on this board. You're a pretty cool guy...gal...internet being...

Thanks. And my grandmother just died last night. She was the best person in my whole family. It sucks.

And I only say it like that because I've been told that by other people (that they hate me/what I do). I'm not trying to be overly dramatic about it.

My condolences to you. If you need anything, let me know. I may be only a stranger here, but I've had to deal with two losses in two months (Which I probably mentioned before.) One was my only grandfather I had in my life. Don't hesitate to touch base if you need anything.

i like you, bluemouse

Thanks, vhamelin.

And I like you too, rhapsody.

I do remember doing a thread with you partly involved in it. I thought things went pretty smoothly and I have no complaints whatsoever

Okay guys, to debrief:

Thank you for all for taking the time to write in here or in pm, and thanks for all your words, both critical and kind. I think this thread and the peripherals it brought about were a big help to me.

I've decided to drop out of the Cassie vs Gwendolyn Summer Splash Entropy match, due to some people being angry that I had one of my characters in a match involving that title. I'm leaving it in very capable hands.

And I never was  planning on having Taylor appear at SS. She's no longer champ, and so now that I have no pending matches and no current threads, I'm free to back away. At the very least I have a funeral tomorrow, and a 5 hour drive each way, and then another one farther away next week, so I'll be pretty busy.

I don't have an AFW plans in mind atm, so thanks for everything.

I really want to say that I'm sorry for not coming in here earlier to say something to help you out Blue, I wasn't able to come up with anything nice or good to say that might be helpful to you but it's good that you were able to get good words and kind support from everyone else here. I'm really sorry for your loss, and I hope you'll be okay after some time. It must have let out a lot of stress and tension to drop all of those future projects for AFW and have Taylor forfeit the Friction Champion Title. But I think you do deserve to get some rest and relaxation after all you dealt with lately, so be sure to try and take it easy once everything settles down a bit okay Blue?